putting flesh on the bones of my dreams

As the bell must strike the hour
as the west must stab the sun
so our hearts
must heed the flow
of deeper tides that run
far beyond the bare indifference
that prosperity esteems
where the spirit
raves and dances
through our very veins

At winters edge you found me
by the fields of wild gold
my hands still filled with ashes
from fires long cold
you pulled me from the wreckage
of bitterness and blame
flung open the page
and put some flesh on
the bones of my dreams

On the streets
the blossom snowing
and the drum is beating slow
and I hear you speak so clear
well I’m slicing through the fear
setting all the beacons
blazing, baby oh!
it's staring out plainer than ever
brighter than all the fools
gold that gleams
it's simply now or never
putting flesh on the bones
of my dreams

Putting flesh on the bones
of my dreams
putting flesh on the bones
of my dreams

And they can plunder
the cave of sorrows
they can strip the gallery bare
try to build a fence
around the visions
in our heads, choke every spark
in a cloak of despair
but we got something
they can't stifle
with their price tags
and picture frames
got a flower for every rifle
putting flesh on the bones of my dreams

-Lyrics of David Gray's "Flesh"

Luck

Even when I was young, I didn't like the concept of luck. When people wished me "Good Luck" I felt like it cheapened things. Did people really believe that they won a game of cards because of luck? Or that 'the forces of the universe' worked in their favor because they performed a good luck ritual? I always was intentional about pointing out how my Friday the 13th was an especially good day.
Isn't it ironic that I now live in a culture obsessed with luck? Hotels and highrises completely eliminate the 4th and 14th floors of their buildings because it's bad luck. Cell phones numbers with the numbers 4 and 14 are significantly cheaper. The number 8 however is extremely lucky. It's not surprising that the Olympic games will be 08-08-08 in Beijing. Bring on the luck!
The other day I was helping a friend barter for a purse she really wanted. I don't want to brag, but I've become well known for my bargaining skills. Anyway, she had gotten the storekeeper down to 80 yuan ($10) for a knock-off purse. His sales tactic was "It's good luck!" Nice try. I told him, "I'll risk the bad luck and pay 40". Everyone got a good laugh and we ended somewhere in the low 50's.
Today, when I got home I started to think about my life. I thought about the joy I have in my job this year and how undeserving I am. Shaking my head I thought, "I'm just so... so.. lucky.. ugh.. fortunate..ugh" The truth is, no word fit into that sentence. I don't deserve this, and that's the point. I haven't made any 'universe' happy. I haven't become the recipient of good karma. I'm a child of a great Dad, and he gives me gifts that I don't deserve. And that is the point.

A Year in Pictures

I'm definitely not a photographer, but I've enjoyed documenting this past year in Asia. The link to the Flickr photoset is below. Your comments are welcome.

Click here

stream of consciousness

i need to lesson plan for tomorrow, still haven't even looked at unit two yet. windsor pilates, my core is sore. need to water this ikea plant, i wonder if it'll make it all year. this is a great song, i never get sick of third day. hmmm. can't believe i still haven't seen them in concert. are they even still a band? will i ever get the chance? i heard they put on a good show. i need to get a new visa, so that i can apply for olympics tickets. priority? opening ceremony and swimming finals. the swimming facility looks like a big ice cube, that'll be interesting to see in person. i hope cori's having an amazing time right now in india. shoot, i need to find a stellar hong kong hostel for us. showing her and teeny around china will be so much fun. i need to figure out the subway system before then too. i have a lot to do, and it starts with the lesson plan. now.

and it hit me...

there are moments, brief moments, that i forget i live here. when i forget that my closest family member is a 12 hour plane ride away, that my dinner options are noodles or rice, or that i live in a country that i have a 3 year-old's proficiency in the language. those moments are usually snapped back to reality pretty quickly.

my grandfather loved the outdoors. my memories of him are in his suspenders, tending his prized garden, sweating, and telling me stories that i'd heard before. summers in kerman could reach the upper 110's and that made for a sweaty and therefore smelly guy. i learned last year that when it comes to our memory, smell is more powerful than all the other senses combined. the point of this is coming soon.

the other day i got onto a crowded bus headed to beijing. i put my ipod in and settled in for the 80 minute bus ride. with "meet virginia" in my ears-i closed my eyes. i had tuned out sight and sound, but i couldn't stop the smell that filled my nasal cavity. it was what grandpa smelled like before he jumped in the pool to cool off. frankly, it was the smell of body odor. chinese people don't wear deodorant, but they also don't have b.o. i couldn't help it, i had to open my eyes and figure out the source. i looked around and in the very back of the bus spotted 3 hippie americans. how did i know they were americans? all i had to do was pause my song for a couple seconds and their loud voices filled the bus. they had just climbed "mu tian yu"- the famous great wall site right by my house. ten rows up i heard all about it. how is it that i smelled an american before i saw him? that's amazing. it hit me, i live here, i'm not a tourist.

the other moment was today. i was headed to work- left the apartment on time, went down the stairwell, and as soon as i stepped outside realized that the rain had really picked up. i usually ride my bike the two miles to work. the dilemma did not lie in- should i take a taxi or not? that part was clear. i should- i was in a skirt, our dirt road had turned to mud with small lakes. the question was- could i pull it off? could i successfully communicate to a taxi driver where i wanted to go? and to be honest, i froze. i stood in the rain without an umbrella for a good minute running through the scenario... and the vocabulary. and it hit me, i live here, i really need to learn the language.

the more i write this out the more examples i can think of. last one.. because it's funny. yesterday i went for a business meeting at dove chocolate. when i got inside i saw the factory. everyone was in white jumpsuits and it was all very white and organized. chocolate bars rolled down the conveyor belt... i started playing 'umpa lumpa' in my head. you would too, trust me. anyway, after our meeting was over i made a reference to "Willy Wonka and the Choc...olate....Fac... tory." Blank stares from 7 identically dressed white jump-suited, middle-aged, chinese guys. the comedy of it all was too much to take. i started to laugh and no one laughed with me. and it hit me, i live here, and sometimes my jokes hit cultural walls. those jokes are never worth explaining, it's better to just laugh alone.

and just when i thought my candle-lit blog gave me some escapism, the man who lives on the other side of this wall just hawked a big loogie...the same ones that fall at my feet almost daily in the city. another reminder that i definitely live here. and i've learned to like it. hmmm, goodnight.

unforced rhythms of grace

"Are you tired? Worn out? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me- watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
-The Message (Matt. 11)

Noodles of the World

On the plane I sat next to a Mexican dentist named Cristina. She's visiting China for the first time. She said she loved Europe and I told her I'd never been. On the plane they served us instant noodles and she leaned over and almost secretly told me that in Italy they put noodles with tomatoes and call it 'spah-hetti'. With raised eyebrows and nodding of the head she said, "itz bedi goud". I didn't have the heart to tell her that I knew. I just looked down at my chow mein and said, "Huh, with tomatoes..."

(All that to say- I'm back, safe, and waking up at 5am every morning.)

Welcome Home

I've been in America for 5 weeks. When I first got off the plane at LAX, we went to Customs where a old man behind the counter asked me, "Where ya comin' from?" I replied, "China". There's an element of respect that happens with Customs officials, where I feel it's appropriate to respond like I've been pulled over for a speeding ticket. Keep the answers short, be polite, say 'sir', minimalize eye contact.
He asked, "How long were ya there?" Looking down at my precious passport I replied, "About a year..." He stamped me back in to the United States, handed me the little blue book and said with a nod, "Welcome home". I met his smiling eyes and teared up a little. I was home.
When you think about it, "home" is a relative term. I've really enjoyed my time in the US...I'm learning to enjoy the present and to not always project satisfaction in the future. I believe this is something we must practice.
I have enjoyed the green lawns, the inside jokes between family, driving, CNN, huge worship gatherings, blue skies, the beach, spontaneous gatherings of friends, chai tea lattes, and bookstores. Far above the material differences, I've cherished the time with family and friends the most. I am immensely blessed to have incredible people pouring into my life. People that support what I do, challenge my thoughts, and share my passions. I've been in a state of gratefulness since I've been back.
I'm sorry for the blog-neglect, I have some posts lined up...one about a late night trip to the Laundromat in Monterey. Riveting material.

question

Is it wrong that I painted my toes while watching Braveheart this afternoon?

It felt like I broke some unwritten rule.

$12.50 to the support fund!

For those of you supporting me next year, I have good news! Instead of needing to raise $20,000 in support, I just need $19,987.50. I won a 100 yuan bet tonight ($12.50) off of a teammate. He underestimated me.

Let me explain some of the context.

Every week our team has dinner together and almost exclusively we go to the same restaurant. One of the advantages of living in a country that you can't read the language (Wo can bu dong!) is that you can name the restaurants/streets/stores. Our favorite restaurant is one we named Babylonian Minstrel (long story).

Tonight was different than the dozens before it, I really stepped out in my language skills. Dan encouraged me to write our order in Chinese characters. I successfully wrote 4 dishes. They were (typed in pinyin here): gan bian dou jiao (green beans), jing jiang rou si (pork slivers and onions), kung pao ji ding (kung pao chicken), and rou mou qiezi (eggplant).

Chinese food in China is eaten family style, so everyone normally votes on dishes. I said, "Ok, what about "tou dou si"? (potato slivers)

At that point, Mikayla confessed she didn't like them and that they were tasteless in her opinion. (gasp!) Dan and Rachel agreed. I was shocked. We ordered them only because I suggested it this whole year?

Stephen and Adam joined us later, because they were across town when we left for dinner. When they sat down I asked them what they thought of "tou dou si". They both said they liked it. Then I told them that Mik, Rach, and Dan didn't like the potato slivers we always ordered. At that point, Dan suggested that if I really wanted some, I could ask the couple next to us for a bite. Indeed, next to us sat a super cute and young Chinese couple with "tou dou si".

It quickly turned into a dare with Stephen offering 100 yuan (one day's salary!) to me, if I got a chopstick full of potato from the couple next to us. Everyone was adding hilarious commentary. In my mind, I was stringing together sentences to explain to the couple that I needed a little bit of potatoes to gain a large sum of money.

I did it, I got some potatoes. And this is verbatim (translated) what I said. (Insert tons of hand motions and a big smile.)

I walked over to their table, chopsticks in hand. Pulled out a chair and sat down. This is what I said in Mandarin, "My name is Allison. They (pointing) are my friends. I want a little potato sliver. My friends have 100 yuan for me. I'm sorry. Is that ok?" They nodded and smiled back. My friends were knee-slapping, watery-eyed laughing. I had a potato sliver and said "Thank you!"

We left almost immediately afterward and Dan asked the couple if they understood what happened. They said they completely understood. Yeah!

Don't worry, I picked up their tab. Everyone won, and Stephen got a great laugh for just $12.50! (Insert a wink here.)

8 Random Facts

This blog is dedicated to Katie over at http://l-i-t.blogspot.com
She requested 8 Random Facts about me, and here they are. I tried not to self-monitor, these are the 8 that came to mind right away.

1. My Body Is Asymmetrical. After careful observation for years, I have come to a few strange observations about my body and how asymmetric it is. First I am convinced that right armpit sweats more than my left. My right arm is significantly stronger than my left and in high school when I raced in the backstroke, I would sometimes veer into the lane ropes on the right. Recently I have discovered that my left leg is shorter than my right. I won't bore with the discovery, but I can assure you, it's a little bit shorter. I remember a conversation years ago with my mom when she pointed out the asymmetry of most newscaster's faces. I haven't been the same since, I'm always looking for that droopy eye.

2. Seven Years of Ballet. When I was 4 I was enrolled in ballet lessons. The lessons didn't stop until I was 11. I danced in the Nutcracker every year. Now that I think about it, I did jazz and tap some of those years too. I also was a cheerleader for 4 years. All that to say, I have no coordination. A slight variation in the sidewalk and I'm on the ground. In our stairwell in China, I've tripped on the same stair at least 5 times. If we've spent more than 2 hours in each other's presence, you probably have a story about a time I fell. Now, I blame it on the shorter left leg.

3. Matilda- When I was in the 6th grade, my aunt got my cousins and I on as extras in the film, Matilda. It's a kiddie movie with Danny DeVito and my aunt was working Wardrobe. As a 6th grader this was huge. I was a freckled 11-year old that managed to get a shot of my face in the film. No, not just in the background, but my entire mug filling the screen. I don't usually tell people about this, but my mom sent the new Matilda DVD to me in a care package a couple weeks ago. My teammates wondered, "Why Matilda?" The truth came out and before I knew it, my faced was paused on the screen and everyone was taking pictures of their face with the same expression. My awkward 11th year is forever documented.

4. First concert was Billy Ray Cyrus' "Achy Breaky Heart Tour" in South Florida. A couple of us rebellious girls snuck in at a fair after selling Girl Scout Cookies. I was great at selling Girl Scout cookies. That stint didn't last past Brownies, but I could push the cookies. Probably the reason I ended up with a Marketing degree.

5. I'll be living in Beijing in 2008 before and during the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games. Should be interesting.

6. To Do Lists- I make extremely long to-do lists. I empty my brain of everything that needs to be done, even the really small things. And then I triumphantly cross them off. At the end of the list I write something that I've already finished and then cross it off immediately. It's a mind game for myself, I suppose.

7. Music trivia- My musical knowledge is pretty much non-existent. I don't know album titles, or band members, or the titles of songs. I don't know what a bridge is, or scales, or the opposite of alto. But if you're humming, I can probably sing the lyrics that match it. And therein, lies the mystery of it. I like to think of myself as some sort of musical elitist in that regard- I don't know the singer or the components- I'm just in it for the music. The reality is that I don't care and no matter how much my friends act disappointed... the song title/artist category of my brain was filled in my youth by Billy Joel, Rod Stewart, Elton John, and U2.

8. When I was learning to read, I memorized the Dr. Seuss book "One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish." Sometimes, at the strangest times, it pops into my head. The song "Get a Haircut and get a real job" by Blues Travelers (I think?), and "Jesus, lover of my soul" also fill my mind at weird times. As does Ephes. 3:14-21, I memorized it one spring break in a park in Mexicali, Mexico.

In the time it took me to write this blog, I've killed three mosquitoes whom most assuredly feasted on my skin last night. I've left and gone on a walk in the sweltering heat of Nanchang, and I've learned that Starbucks bought out Dietrich's coffee. My friends, we've lost another great coffee company.

love the questions themselves

"Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer."
- Rainer Maria Rilke, 1903, in "Letters to a Young Poet"

you've got mail

Tonight after a long walk, I sat down for an American movie.
Some people, after spending time overseas, come back and sit in judgment of their culture. I think I'm going to come back and embrace it. Sure, I recognize America has it's faults. While watching the classic chick flick "You've Got Mail" with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, I found myself really missing America.
Ah...Tree-lined streets, coffee shops, street fairs, bookstores, Thanksgiving, Christmas, huge public libraries, people walking dogs (not eating them!), diversity, English-speaking (ha ha). Anyway, I'm looking forward to the USA.
I fly back June 26th. That night a group of us are going to the Anaheim Angels baseball game- how's that for re-emergence? Then there'll be transfer meeting at Azusa Pacific on the 27th, and finally late on the night of the 27th I'll head to San Diego.
Friends that were dating are now engaged, co-workers have gotten different jobs, roommates have graduated and gotten 'real jobs', friends have moved, businesses have closed. I don't really know the extent of change, but I'm excited to see each ounce of it. See you in 29 days, that's less than a month!

fiona

i have a friend named fiona. my teammates know her as 'red shoes fiona', because she has an endless collection of little red shoes. for months she couldn't make eye contact with me because she was so very shy. we went out to dinner at the beginning of the year and she told me about her family- the girl has been through a lot. she cried, i cried, and we were served a huge fish in a sweaty outdoor restaurant. our friendship has been close since. we've celebrated birthdays together, had tea at my house, and just began to meet weekly.

i've brought up my favorite book a couple times in conversation and she's always showed interest, so i got her a copy. last week i gave her an overview and then assigned some reading. she boldly said, "i must know the Mark!".

today was our first meeting and it was a privledge to be a part of. the absolute newness of the material is shocking! i can't type her dozens of adorable questions like, "Why did John eat locusts? It tastes horrible" but i wanted to include her first Thought, i was able to write it down.

"i'm fiona. i know you from miss allison. i begin to love you so if i meet anything happy or unhappy i will tell you."

before she left she asked me at the door, "the Last Supper, did (the Son) eat locusts? because i would just eat rice."

rice at the last supper, that's contextualization.

mirror, mirror

sometimes when i look in the mirror, i'm surprised by my reflection. kind of taken aback by the fact that i'm alive. that others know me, that my words affect them and that i have a unique identity. i get closer and look at myself more.. i don't check out the color of my eyes, instead i'm just trying to match my thoughts and dreams with the person i see in the mirror. i think about myself in light of eternity. and i think about all the millions of people i've walked by in the last 23 years and how we get one shot at life. we read books to make life better, we search high and low for love, we work hard so that we can retire well in 40 years. and we yearn for purpose.

our bathroom light is out and tonight as i loaded my pink toothbrush with mint toothpaste in darkness, i looked up and saw myself with just the lighting from the kitchen. i stood frozen and stared back. with so many thoughts racing through my head, i remember thinking, "hmm, this is the form i'm in." and it surprised me.

does this happen to you? my roommate rachel said it happens to her in large crowds sometimes.

Nanchang pride

Lately, American media has been acknowledging our little 4 million person Chinese city, and I thought I'd take a moment to boast.

1. Nanchang is featured on msn.com in the "The Week in Pictures" for a pothole that occured last week, downtown on Shunwai Road. I love how the pictures above capture the bicycles, tile sidewalks, and large amounts of spectators.

2. A friend told me that the next season of Survivor would be filmed in Nanchang. I strongly doubted that any American TV show would/could film an entire show here. But according to CBS, they are indeed filming in China. Whether or not it is in Nanchang, we'll have to wait and see. I guarantee that someone I know will print a shirt saying something like "I Survived Nanchang" and worse yet, I'll buy one.

3. And last, and probably most impressive...Newsweek named Nanchang on it's Top 10 Most Dynamic Cities in the World. We got #6! The article notes the world's tallest ferris wheel (which I have yet to ride), the historical significance as the birthplace of Chinese communism, and most importantly the huge investments made by foreign companies, like Ford. In case you're curious, Las Vegas was chosen as #1.

When I asked our boss if he'd heard that his hometown was chosen as the 6th most dynamic in the world, he shook his head and said, "I don't see anything dynamic..."

"what's wrong?"

I read the article below on abcnews.com and was at first shocked that 5,000 people would call a kid on YouTube that merely said "I care". But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that there are many Americans with a huge lack of community or intimacy. We are made for wanting intimacy, and people find all sorts of means to satisfy that desire. Apparently, they even call spiky haired 20 year olds.

SOUTHBRIDGE, Mass. Apr 22, 2007 (AP)— Ryan Fitzgerald is unemployed, lives with his father and has a little bit of time on his hands.

So, he decided to offer his ear, to anyone who wants to call. After posting a video with his cell phone number on YouTube on Friday, the 20-year-old told The Boston Globe he has received more than 5,000 calls and text messages.

Fitzgerald said he wanted to "be there," for anyone who needed to talk. "I never met you, but I do care," a spiky-haired Fitzgerald said into the camera on his YouTube posting.

He planned to take and return as many calls he could, but on Monday at 5 a.m., his T-Mobile cell phone payment will begin charging him for his generosity when he is no longer eligible for free weekend minutes.

"I haven't quite figured out what I'm going to do about it," he said. "Come Monday, no way I'm going to just hang up on people and say, 'I don't have the minutes.'"

Fitzgerald, who said people consider him "easy to talk to," was inspired by Juan Mann. YouTube video clips of Mann offering "Free Hugs" to strangers became wildly popular on the user-controlled Internet site.

"Some people's own mothers won't take the time to sit down and talk with them and have a conversation," Fitzgerald said. "But some stranger on YouTube will. After six seconds, you're not a stranger anymore, you're a new kid I just met."

What about praying?

sacrifice, dogs, and West Coast superiority

Sacrifice:
Last week in class we talked about crime and punishment. That crimes deserve a punishment... if we commit a crime, we must also accept the punishment. I gave them this scenario, "What if your best friend commited a crime and faced a horrible punishment? What if you could save your friend by giving up something that is very important to you?" We then brainstormed things we would give up to save our friend. The lists they came up with were great! They'd give time, money, status, reputation, love, family, friends, job, dreams, opportunities, and their own life. I defined those as sacrifice- that giving up things that are important to us are 'sacrifices'. That lead straight into the Easter story. It really clicked for them, that He was the sacrifice for the crimes of humanity. It was such a great week of classes!

Dogs:
During our discussion of crime and punishment, I put a list of crimes on the board and had the class judge the punishments that they deserved. I made it more personal for the class and ascribed the crimes to actual students in the class. So for outspoken Sarah, I said she "stole a mobile phone from a store". Sarah shook her head and said, "But I'm an honest girl..." Her judgment, made by Willow, was a fine and 20 hours of community service. I said that William "didn't feed his dog for a month". No one thought it was a big deal, which surprised me. I asked, "Isn't that animal cruelty?" William responded, "No! Dogs are delicious!" That ended the conversation... cultural difference #486.

West Coast:
On Tuesday nights we have our weekly faculty meetings and Team Dinner. This Tuesday Dan was out of town and we made the decision to have an extravagant night by going out to Pizza Hut for dinner. Pizza Hut is high class in China, we drop about $4 each, which is big money here. I'm not kidding, we look forward to cheese at Pizza Hut. I think one day I'll look back at our Pizza Hut joy and get a good laugh, for now it's legit excitement at Western atmosphere, forks, etc. So Tuesday night at dinner we got in a little debate.. West Coast vs. East Coast. I pulled out the old slogan "The West Coast is the best coast." Childish, I know, but I had to state my loyalty. We went back and forth for awhile. Mikayla and I on the West Coast Team. Stephen, Adam and Emily on the East Coast Team. And Rachel stayed neutral- she's from North Dakota. It was friendly banter. When we left the restaurant we split up to go in different taxis and it was just Stephen, Rachel and I. Stephen looked at me, with a pretty serious expression and said, "Alright, on the West Coast you have gangs, but on the East Coast...we have extended family". That sent the 3 of us into laughter, it's more funny if you know Stephen's North Carolina drawl, actually much more funny.

rain and jazz music really go together

It's Saturday and I just looked outside to a sea of umbrellas, students scrurrying about on their way to Saturday classes. The rain is really coming down and I'm spending the morning listening to jazz music (got a Getz/Gilberto song off iTunes that is great!) and cleaning my room.
We watched 'Hostage' last night in Dan's apartment and my throat is sore from screaming during the 'air duct scene'. My goodness, Mikayla and I freaked out for a solid 10 minutes. Dan and Adam just laughed at us. I need some tea and honey.

4/5 completed

I've been in China for 8 month! Can you believe it?

You know what they say, "Live Free or Die Hard"!

(8 months is tough.. I miss you guys!)

mi madre es muy bonita.

At one point I thought I was returning to the United States next year and I got excited about it. I like California, I really do. I like avocados, and sunshine, and speaking Spanish. I signed up for the Spanish-English Dictionary "word of the day" to brush up on my Spanish. Everyday for the last two weeks they've sent me obvious Spanish words like "English=university Spanish=universidad". I just unsubscribed. It was almost an insult to get today to get "English=fluctuate Spanish=fluctuar". I wonder if there's a Chinese-English word of the day out there... that's what I should be studying.

I'm staying in China next year. I got a very exciting job in Beijing! I applied, never thought I'd get it, and I did. Wow...I'm still kind of surprised when I think about it. More about it later...

In other news, my mom "The Debster" came to China last week and I met her in Shanghai. We rode a 410 km/hour speed train, ate fancy Chinese food, explored a pearl market, watched silk spinning, stayed up late and chatted, rode a boat on the Pudong River, and really had a great time together. The trip was a Valentine's Day present from Rod- what a guy! I see some of my mom's quirks in my personality and just have to laugh. She is one of a kind, if you knew her, you'd agree. I hope I look like her when I'm over 50...I mean... eternally 29. (I probably believed she was 29 from the ages of 4-8, and then I realized she had me when she was 30. I've always been good at math). All that to say, seeing her and spending 3 solid days together was a breath of fresh air.

Happy Easter from East Asia! What a great holiday to celebrate. 1 Corin. 15. Stand firm, let nothing move you, always give yourselves fully to the work.

things i love...

Sumatra Coffee- brewed in the morning, sipped while I get ready for work, part of a care package!

Sudoku- the Advanced book I got in the mail randomly from my Aunt Kathy. I love teaching it to students on the lawn, and distracting them from their constant test-prep.

American Pop songs- but ONLY when Chinese students sing them loud and proud- some of the best include “My Heart Will Go On” from Titanic, and “I Want It That Way” by N’Sync (?)

Little Miss Sunshine- Olive gets left at the gas station and has to run alongside the car, because the VW van will stall out. The body smuggling from the hospital, the dance performance at the end…good flick.

Thursday Question Day- My little cousin Amelia is full of questions about my life, so we reserved a day for her to call and ask questions to her heart’s desire. She’s 11 and feisty and her questions make me laugh so hard. I look forward to her calls.

Chinese Lessons- When we transcend tone practice and pronunciation and laugh together.

Third Day- the Offerings album brings back a flood of great memories from high school.

My old Pumas- great arch support and so comfortable that it feels like I’m wearing socks. It doesn’t hurt that I got them really cheap in NYC, when a retailer mislabeled the display.

Baseball games- $5 lawn seats at Petco Park! Bring a blanket, sit on the lawn with friends, and watch the Padres play.

The big Marlin on the wall at my Grandma’s house- there’s something comforting about the giant stuffed fish that fills a wall in her TV room. The room also contains 49er fanfare and tons of Louis L’Amour books. Some of my grandpa Fred’s greatest passions: deep-sea fishing, San Francisco football, and books about the West.

Sailing- in Mission Bay with friends, on a Hobie Cat catamaran, with a visit to the penguins at Sea World.

Voicemails on Skype- the long-drawn out messages when good friends ramble about their day and include random details. I love those the best.

Wang- a street vendor just outside our school that sells Chinese flat bread. We both wave, yell “Ni Hao!” and smile everytime we see each other. This has gone on several times a week for the last 7 months. It doesn’t get old.

Apple Computers- I love Mac’s. Knock them if you want to, but I’m pretty loyal to my iBook. It has served me well.

Crystal Lite- nothing spices up a bottle of water better than lemonade or raspberry crystals. Simply refreshing.

The Office- a great TV show. If you’ve seen it, I’m sure you agree. Dwight is my favorite character by far.

Just Brushed Teeth feeling- pretty self explanatory, I just brushed mine, and I love it.

Pilates- on the tile in my livingroom, with Mikayla, and our commentary as we challenge our ‘core’ with the Australian woman on the video.

Moments of Understanding- those times when, as a teacher, you can explain a concept/word/idea and your students really get it. They nod their heads, apply it, and ask thoughtful questions. Teaching is a rewarding profession.

Forrest Gump quotes- from Tracy, my Chinese friend. She’s only read the book, I bought her the movie this weekend and we’re watching it soon. I can’t wait to see her face when Tom Hanks brings the words to life. She’s going to love it! There’s something great about “Stupid is as stupid does” coming from a 20 year old Chinese girl.

the importance of being honest

A letter sent to me by Bill through his girlfriend, Starr. Bill couldn't make it to class today and was 'asking for leave'.

Miss Alice,

Happy New Year! Im sorry to tell you I couldn't enter your class today. For there will be a very excellent NBA Game between the Rockets and the Suns and I'm eager to watch it. Also I'd like to tell you the final result if allowed to. Here wish you happy every day in the New Year!

Yours,
Bill

(I have to value Bill's honesty. When other students say that they're in the hospital when asking for leave- Bill has nothing to hide, there's a good game on.)

Cultural Note: Yao Ming plays for the Houston Rockets and many of my students wear his jersey to class. He's a huge star- a Chinese basketball player that lives in the States...it's a dream for many of them.
Also, Allison is sometimes difficult for my students to pronounce, and Bill is one of a handful that calls me Alice. I think it's funny.

freckles

A Chinese cultural note: Chinese people love porcelain white skin. They buy creams, they bleach, they used umbrellas in the sun- anything to keep their skin as white as possible. It is unfathomable to them that American women and men (for the most part) desire to be 'tan'. The fact that we intentionally lay outside and let the sun make our skin darker is a shock.

When I explained the concepts of tanning booths, tanning lotions, and bronzing powders to my good Chinese friends their faces were the picture of horror. "Why? It makes no sense!", they said. I just shrugged and we had a great conversation about the definition of beauty in different cultures. One of the girls Christina has freckles dotting the brim of nose and cheeks- and one of her friends commented on her friend's "spots". "Spots? No, they're freckles. They're cute", I said. Again, faces of horror and a smile on Christina's face as the super white American (me) told her that her 'spots' were cute. I, again, explained that they are a sign of youth and many famous models in America have freckes. Christina said she was going to move to America so she can be considered beautiful.

I warned my friends that I would be traveling to Thailand over the Chinese New Year, and I hoped to get tan myself. After months of little sunshine in Nanchang- and my first real winter in my life- I was beyond white. My students called me "piao liang" sometimes which means beautiful in Chinese. But I longed for a hint of color. At one point someone took a picture at dinner with a porcelain cup in hand and indeed I was as white as the cup! The absolute definition of 'porcelain white'. The first day on Koh Phayam I got burnt, bad. Mikayla was a great friend and applied aloe and after sun lotion on my back for days.

By the end of our week on the island of Koh Phayam I had picked up some sun and felt great about it. I wondered what my students would think. I was now considered less beautiful in their culture. Before school started, my friend Tracy stopped by my apartment. The first thing that came out of her mouth was, "You are SOOO black!" and she shook her head in disappointment. I had to laugh- and then kindly explain to her that she should use the word 'dark'. I might be less beautiful in China, but it's so nice to see a couple freckles on my cheeks and not blend in with my tea cup.

i wish you could meet them.

I wish you could meet my students. I wish you could see their faces in the classroom, the way that they look confused at new vocabulary, and the way that they light up when it's understood. I wish you could see them playing basketball with such vigor and heart, yet lacking height and skill. I wish you could see the girls like Willow, full of style and sass- eager to know the deeper meaning of life. I wish you knew Edward who dreams of living in American and asks the most random and obscure culture questions, or Gabe who has me define the 14 different ways that Americans use the word "like". And oh, I wish you could meet Tracy, who shows up to my apartment whenever she pleases for hot chocolate and a chat. The way that she asks hard questions during our Study, the way that her nose beads with sweat when she's nervous, the way that she will hold your arm as she thinks of the correct English word to explain herself.

I wish you knew their names and their faces- all 400 of them. I wish I had enough time to tell you the stories- hilarious, heart-wrenching, thought-provoking, and beautiful. The stories of our interactions.. the countless hours in the classroom, the office, the city, and my apartment.

Today as I walked home from class, and was greeted by one student after another, I became overwhelmed with gratefulness. Thank you for sending me here, thank you for encouraging me this year, thank you for being supportive. Students are being transformed all the time, and I'm in awe. I just wish you could meet them.

Hong Kong thoughts

My unassisted heart is barren clay,
That of its native self can nothing feed:
Of good and pious works Thou art the seed,
That quickens only where Thou sayest it may:
Unless Thou show to us Thine own true way
No man can find it: Father! Thou must lead.
-Michael Angelo

"His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.
For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our LJC. But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins."
-Simon Peter (2 Peter 1:3-9)

words on a page

Traveling for 6 weeks has afforded me many hours of transit time in which to catch up on reading. Here are some books that I've completed or in the middle of as we speak. It's really an addiction.

Tuesdays with Morrie- good, read it in a coffee shop in Kolkata in a few hours.

Life of Pi- highly recommended, I bought it in India (it's filled with Indian culture) and read it on the beach in 2 days. The setting is the Pacific Ocean, so the words really came alive as I stared at the Andaman Sea in front of me.

Freakonomics- insightful, made me feel like I was a business student again. I don't know if I believe it's insights, but overall worth the read.

The Great Divorce- allegorical, but had some great points. I think I'll re-read it today. Super small, but I'm sure I missed some C.S. Lewis nuggets.

TIME Magazine- an issue about the future of China and America's relationship. I read the entire thing cover to cover. There are no such issues in China, had to pick it up in Hong Kong.

Rivertown- a book about a young American guy that teaches English with the Peace Corp in China along the Yangtze. The experiences he has really mirror mine, but I think his setting descriptions can be too lengthy at times.

Catcher in the Rye- an old favorite of mine. I love the voice of Holden, maybe I have a crush on him? ;)

Reaching Out- I pretty much love Henri Nouwen's writing. Themes definitely overlap from Compassion, but I enjoy his insight.

The Good Book- read through 1 Peter, 2 Peter, James, 1 John, and I'll re-read Hebrews (we studied it all semester together). Also reading Luke, but not as consistently as I'd like.

Lastly, it's been great to journal! Trying to get the words down about the numerous adventures has been difficult, but great to look back on those first few days in India.

Any literary suggestions? I plan on hitting up a book store before flying out of Hong Kong, so please offer input!

wuzza flickr?

Just a small portion of pictures have been posted from the trip so far on Flickr. Click on the link on the right hand side and take a peak, comments are welcome!

heading to bangkok

tomorrow morning i'm leaving for bangkok, thailand and then to koh phayam for a week. this last week in chiang mai has been a great time to recharge and spend time alone and with friends from all over southeast asia.
please keep mikayla in your thoughts- a good friend of hers died today from a rare type of cancer. reminded again that life is fragile (long sigh).
safe and learning so much,
alli jo

in india

I'm sitting at an internet bar in the middle of Bhubaneshwar, India on the east coast by the Bay of Bengal. Indian guys all around me are watching New Zealand and Australia's cricket match and playing internet games. What a whirlwind the last 10 days have been!

Two Fridays ago I turned in grades for my Sophomore university students and got on a train for Hong Kong. I'm on Chinese New Year and traveling with 3 other people for 6 weeks. We took an overnight train and arrived in Hong Kong, my favorite city to date! The skyline was incredible, on the water, so clean and full of international flair. We were full blown tourists for 3 days visiting SoHo and taking a water ferry to Victoria Peak and finally eating some Mexican food! Being a Californian, it's been way too long! We went to church on the Kowloon side and met some incredible people from all over the world. Then we jumped on a plane and went to Bangkok and then to New Delhi, India. In New Delhi we got caught in a tourism bubble that we've now coined the "Indian Tourism Mafia".. it's this web of high priced accomodations, taxis etc. and everyone knows each other. At one point we thought we had escaped and made plans to travel to Agra and Jaipur to see the Taj Mahal.. and in walked one of the mob guys again to our "new" travel agency. We sighed knowing that eventually we'd we flying to a friends hometown in India.

The Taj was great and my feeble words here in this internet bar cannot do justice to the insanity of the past week. Picture the Amazing Race and you have our team of 4 (Heather, Jev, Michael and I). We've gotten along great and our personalities really complement each other. We're in a bit of culture shock coming from 5-6 months in China yet still being treated like Americans in India.

We then flew to Orissa (Bhubaneshwar) to a fellow Indian colleague (in China) home in India. We've ridden elephants, got stuck in a cattle drive, visited indigenous people, and eaten curry for every meal. This has been the best part to be in the village with them, eating at their home and learning the culture.

I'll tell you about yesterday and just multiply it by 10. Last night our friend's family treated me like a dress-up doll, putting bindhis (sp?) on my forehead, bengals on my wrists, braiding my hair and putting big gold earrings in my ear. I've even worn a sari! Last night we ate from banana leaves with our hands and drank some questionable water (the verdict is still out on sickness)- pray for me! We went on a 4 hour boat ride yesterday day to an animal reserve on Chilika Lake. We landed on an island with an indigineous tribe that worships the Hindu god Kaliji. Ah, I'm frustrated that I can't get everything into an email!

Our host Pradeep (a friend of our China co-worker) is a journalist/activist for the poor (Dalits, etc.) here in India. He raises awareness through an organization named ODAF (funded by a German organization) that works primarily with the tribes in the upper jungles of India. They help them learn how to grow sustainable products and how to defend themselves legally against "corporate development". We are going to one of those tribes tomorrow for 3 days!! They are primitive and definitley not a tourist attraction. This is only made possible by the NGO that Pradeep works for. If you know me well, you know I'm squirming with excitement at this opportunity! I've been able to show off some of my Aveda knowledge being that India uses Ayerveda medicine. Seeing activists doing the very thing I learned about during my time at Aveda has been really encouraging.

I've spent long enough typing this email and internet has gone out a couple times, so I'll end this now. Miss you guys and I'll try to write again from our conference in Thailand. Can't wait to post pictures on Flickr and email when I have more time and more clarity.

Much love,
Alli Jo